Back To School...

The shuffling of the books, the loading up of the $0.10 notebooks at wal-mart, the choosing of the outfits, you can smell it in the air, it's back to school time.

Everyone knows the feeling: having to switch back your summertime schedule of waking up at 4pm, getting the brain ready for thinking about more than "how many beers can i drink before i can't remember... anything?" It's a challenging time for students all around the country.

The worst part about going back to school is knowing that you're going to be facing another semester of mediocrity sitting in class with smart kids who seem to actually enjoy studying.


Can pull out straight a's and no girl's phone numbers simultaneously

Of course, it isn't that you can't get good grades, it's because you won't. This is what most people tell themselves when they're in a state of denial about the possiblity that they're not actually as smart as their parents have told them their entire lives. Face it, you're stupid, and there's nothing anyone can do about it, so if it helps to keep telling youself that it's a matter of effort, go right ahead.

Of course, the best part of going back to school is being able to stalk meet friends from class again. If you think about it, there aren't any other places where you can sit directly behind a coed and lean ever-so-slightly in for the i'm-taking-notes-but-i'm-really-smelling-your-hair move. Creepy? Perhaps. Awesome? Undeniably.

Haven't thought his plan through of how to check out girls in the class with all these pesky books

Even without that many hot girls in your class (damn you, biology!!!!), there are still things to look forward to.

Firstly... um... well, i can't really think of anything to look forward to, but i'm sure there's something. I guess it's good that i'm done with school, and don't really have to rack my brain trying to think of fancy things like big words to describe stuff, and... stuff.

So, for all you kids going back to school, enjoy those little things, like, well... knowing that once it's all over, you'll probably still have a really hard time getting a job that pays more than minimum wage.



Mitch Hedberg's QotD:

Mr. Pibb is a replica of Dr Pepper, but it's a bullshit replica, 'cuz dude didn't even get his degree. Why did you have to drop out of school and start making pop so soon?