The Reality of TV (Part 2.5)

In this edition of as TV turns: game shows.
now, there are several shows out there that have awesome formats, and have stood the test of time. I've never been one of those people who was into "gimicky" shows, although they certainly have their place (i still enjoy a fun episode of "Wheel of Fortune" every once in awhile), instead i have always enjoyed quiz shows (partly based on my personal perception that i am the smartest person alive, although my Jeopardy! test results didn't quite support that statement).

I mentioned Jeopardy! here (note, when you write it, it is required by U.S. Law section 4.20.5339.us.jp.abc.sony that you must put the exclamation point at the end of the title, sort of like the "bum bum" at the end of the song), because that is one of my all time favorite quiz shows.
I haven't really been alive long enough to see the ones that were rigged, but i imagine i would have enjoyed those too, because we really don't care about the people ON the show, all we care about is are we better at the shows than the people we're sitting on the couch with (it helps when you invite all your "stupid" friends over, and act surprised when said quiz show comes on: "oh? look at that... [enter quiz show name here] is on, i guess we might as well watch it").

Which brings me to the rant... There are several shows out there, that are just either ridiculously boring and slow (read: the game show equivalent of baseball), or ones that have good intentions, but still simply... suck.

Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?

Um, me? I can't really make any joke here that hasn't already been made, and obviously who would answer "no" to the question right? (after looking at the logo that i've chosen, it appears that it's the logo for the British version, in which case a million pounds would be much better)
Anyway, the show is one of the examples of those who had good intentions to start, but has careened completely out of control. Do the contestants on the show actually think that I, casual viewer, could give less of a crap about where you heard about whether or not Ivan was a hurricane or not. I mean, it takes them like 5 minutes to answer a freaking question.
If the format was more along the lines of, you answer within a certain time period, or you get eaten alive by sharks... i would watch. Or, if you didn't answer in a certain amount of time, you'd fall through a trap hole in the floor a la:

Russian Roulette

Now, this show was one of my guilty pleasures. Just for the gimmick. I mean, the show itself was ridiculous, but just being able to watch people fall through the ground? Genius.
The closest show by any means of the imagination, was Remote Control on MTV, where the losing contestant was flung into a brick wall (and who doesn't think THAT'S hilarious?).
The downfall of "Russian Roulette" was that it took approximately an IQ of 0.3 to be able to answer the questions correctly (i truly believe that some of the people gave wrong answers on purpose to fall through the floor).
The questions were multiple choice, and were along the lines of: "how many states are there in the United States?" (which, disturbingly enough, a LOT of people don't know)
a) 124 b) 599 c) 50 d) 2

There are several game shows out there that were around well before i was even a twinkle in my parents' eyes... but seemed interesting or not, either way.

You Bet Your Life

Now i have no idea whatsoever about what this game's premise was or what they did on there, or what the duck was for, but if "Millionaire" had the basic tag line of the title of this show, i'd watch it. A true insight into the human psyche as people bet their lives in exchange for $178,000 (after taxes, expenses and fees).
Another completely obscure game (as far as i'm concerned):

The Match Game

Who has any idea WHAT this game was about... matching perhaps? But look at how excited everyone there looks. There on the bottom row in the center? Richard Dawson, original host of Family Feud. Just part of the service at Jon's House of Useless Trivia.

Now to the category of shows that weren't particularly challenging by measure of necessitating ANY form of brain function, but were fun to watch nonetheless.

The Hollywood Squares

Now the name of the show would suggest that the stars on the show were really boring, but nay i say! Now, the latest incarnation might not have really been a huge hit, but it was funny nonetheless. With Whoopi Goldberg (who, turns out isn't Jewish by the way), as the center square, there were some funny moments with not only her, but all the other hilarious guest stars.
The 80s version was the one i personally grew up with, with Joan Rivers as the center square, and the awesome Shadow Stevens working directly "under" her (insert your own joke here).

Press Your Luck

This was seriously one of my favorite shows to watch. I'd watch it everyday after school in order to kill any brain cells that might have been stimulated during the day. The premise of the show, simple enough: press the button, win money. Sweet. Hit a whammy, lose your money. Crap.
They came out with a new "XTREME!" version called "Whammy," but there were just too many little windows, making me drift in and out of dementia while watching it.

Lingo

Seriously one of the most underrated shows, this one is a combination between a quiz show and scrabble. Teams try to find out mystery 5-letter words, by spelling them out, and using clues (correct/incorrect letter, out of place letter), in order to reach into a hole and grab at some balls. Can you say Par-Tay? Plus the GREAT Chuck Woolery (who was consequently, the first host of "Wheel of Fortune") as the host, and once the show got a little more popular, they brought in Australian-accented big boob girl. Nice.

And finally, onto a game that is in a league by itself, perhaps the greatest game show of all time. What is it? Jeopardy!? no, Wheel of Fortune? no. Who Wants to Marry A Millionaire? well... no.

The winner is:

Double Dare!!!!!

(with a close second going to: Super Sloppy Double Dare)
Double Dare, hosted by the greatest TV host of all time (to my generation anyway, ask around to kids of the 80s), Marc Summers. It was the dream of every kid to be able to be on that show (which once again, required IQ levels reaching those of small mice and dandruff). I KNOW kids purposely acted like they didn't know some of the questions JUST so that they could do the physical challenges.
Who didn't want to be on the obstacle course at the end of the show? A loser perhaps?!?!?! To be able to run up a slide covered with chocolate fudge and whipped cream... oh man...
At one point, we even made a fake obstacle course at the day care that i used to go to, but it wasn't quite as glamorous sliding around in dirt and muddy mulch.

But enough of my childhood, and on to the Mitch Hedberg QotD:

I once wrote a letter to my dad, and I wanted to write 'I really enjoy being here' but I accidentally wrote 'I RARELY' instead of 'I REALLY.'
But I wanted to use it, I didn't want to throw it out, so I wrote 'I rarely... drive... steamboats dad. There's alot of shit you don't know about me. Stop trying to act like I'm a steamboat operator. I know this letter took a harsh turn very quickly.'