The Corporate Ladder...

It seems that my friends who have acutal... you know, jobs... always seem to be in a perpetual state of being on the way to, or coming back from, a meeting. It's strange how an entire day can seemingly be taken up by meetings, with breaks in between for lunch, smoking, getting a snack, socializing, chatting online, getting another snack, going to the bathroom to rid onself of said snacks and meals, making copies of various body parts, and other things. How do they find the time?

The other things aside, the entire concept of meetings intrigues me. I mean, who's to say what they're actually talking about in all of those conference rooms? Who knows? As far as anyone else knows, they're just in there, talking about roller coasters with the guy standing up, describing his latest trip to six flags, mapping out the course of the roller coaster with his laser pointer. There seems to be alot of food consumed at these "meetings," so perhaps the purpose of those "meetings" are for corporations to, in a sign of their dedication to be good corporate citizens, get rid of snacks that have almost reached their expiration date.

Another theory of mine is that people perhaps, three of four rungs up on the "corporate ladder" usually come to a point where they realize that they don't have a job that requires actually... doing anything, or perhaps they just haven't had a snack that morning, decide to "call a meeting" to "define objectives" and "discuss progress of objectives" set at the last meeting.

If i were to work in a corporate setting such as this, i would love to be able to "meeting crash" where i would swoop in, act like i'm contributing, by nodding occasionally and saying things such as "but were the objectives really met?" or "how can we do this better?"

I'd love to tell you more, but i have to go to a meeting (i think there might be sandwiches today).

Mitch Hedberg's QotD:

Yeah, I'm not into sports. If I got athelet's foot, my first reaction would be: "that's not my fucking foot!"