The greatest show on earth...

Of course, i'm talking about saved by the bell...

Aside from the fact that dennis haskins (a.k.a. mr. belding) called me once on accident, this will live on as the greatest show of all time. Sure sure, some people might have their opinions, but to those people i say, no.

Zach, kelly, slater, screech, lisa, nikki (from the middle school years), i mean, what did these guys not do? They always got into get rich schemes of some sort, always got into trouble, but somehow, managed to stay out of prison (that was good for zach, cuz he woulda been passed around faster than that one time i was in the slammer.... i don't like to talk about it)...


Well, the coolest part of the show was when they did the little "after show" movie special thing where zach and kelly went to vegas to get married. I mean, what a better way to wrap up the greatest show than with a classy wedding at the little white chapel?


Look at those kids, so hot and studly... uh, i mean, hot and womanly? (crap, i should really find out how to use this "backspace" key). Let me just say here that lark voorhies is one of the hottest women in the world. And oh how those cast members have made so much of themselves after having used the show as their own personal launching pads for their illustrious careers. Lets recap, shall we?

• Mario lopez - a.c. slater - had a spot on "the other side" a show that was supposed to be about dudes' views on stuff conveniently shown against "the view" (a show about how fat and/or really rich women feel about "issues"). Well, that wasn't really that big of an achievement, but hey, he did marry (are they still married?) ali landry... ooh yeah.
• Mark paul gosselaar - zach morris - moved to mongolia where he was subjected to the artutu tribe's ritualistic penis piercing before he moved back to the us to finally star in another show (nypd blue just in case you were wondering)... p.s. i was just kidding about the mongolia thing... or was i?
• Lark voorhies - lisa turtle - born in nashville, tn (as if i needed another reason to like her), has been in basically nothing of note since the show, except she was the lead in the boyz ii men video "on bended knee" (man, i know some obscure facts)
• Elizabeth berkeley - jesse spano - well, we all know where this is going. She left the show, and in an effort to show everyone that she wasn't a "goody two shoes," decided it would be a good idea to show us her non-surgically altered boobs in "showgirls" until we all wanted her to go back to being a goody girl.
• Tiffani amber thiessen - kelly kapowski - well, apparently she's dropped "amber" and just goes by "dub t" now. She's actually made the most of herself, starring in "beverly hills 90210" (the rich man's o.c.), and well, i just imdb'ed her, and well, nothing else.
• Dustin diamond - screech powers - he hasn't really done anything of note since the show, and i don't know if it counts (but since i'm writing this, it counts damnit), is the brother of mike d of the beastie boys.

So i say to you now, support these guys by watching the reruns of their show so that they get royalties, and make saved by the bell "the gift that keeps on giving" maybe not so much for you and me, but for the unbelievably talented actors, even though zach will probably come up with some sort of scheme for him and his boys to make some quick cash.




Mitch Hedberg's QotD:

I wanna hang up a map of the world at my house. Then I wanna stick pins in all of the locations that i've traveled to. But first, I have to travel to the top two corners of the map so it won't fall down.