Organic Toxins...

When i used to live in the south, the word "organic" referred only to a compound contaning carbon (and this only in high school text books, where the information would remain as in a locked and sealed vault never to escape into the minds of those living in the vicinity).

After moving to california however, i have been inundated with the term "organic" referring to having been grown and harvested (and something about pesticides or something). My point is, everyone here tries so hard to be "hip" and "healthy" both things i run away from as fast as possible, that people are quick to adopt things that will serve to make them either more hip or healthy.

Organic foods are the latest trend. When i say latest trend, of course i don't mean in the last several weeks or even months, as everyone knows that the organic food has been around for several years but the organic movement has reached a new high.

I met with a company over the weekend that loves the fact that they are organic and natural. I was given a list of the plethora of ways this company loves being natural and organic with the salesman pointing out that the catalog he handed me was made of organic materials (made of organic materials shall henceforth be referred to as being organic), the ink that was printed on the organic paper was organic, the cups that they were serving samples in were biodegradable, the carpet i was standing on was organic, the free tshirt i was given was organic, the shirt he was wearing was organic, and i believe possibly the air i was breathing was organic as well. Not for nothing, but that just seems to be a slight overkill.

I for one actually enjoy things that are tasty not taking into consideration whether or not it's organic. If the taste i've been raised on is that of pesticides, all i can say is: "mmm, tasty." I mean, the organic energy bars, the organic pizzas and crap just all seem to lack a certain... deliciousness. I mean, they taste fine, but i never find myself craving the stuff as much as the non-organic foods. I suppose it's possible that the ingredients used in pesticides are as equally delicious to humans as they are deadly to insects in which case, isn't that a great trade-off?

Maybe someone should make a pesticide popsicle. I mean, cut out the middleman and get right to the meat of the burger. Seeing as how the pesticide is what i crave anyway, i could only imagine that i could just eat the pesticide directly and not have to deal with the whole "cooking it with vegetables" aspect. It's kind of like the idea behind eating peanuts. I mean, if you wanna eat peanuts, you might as well just go out and buy a can of peanuts, and not book an international flight in order to get some peanuts. Ok, that was a terrible example, but all this organic food in my body is allowing the bugs in my brain to thrive. I need to get some pesticide in there.


Mitch Hedberg's QotD:

They say the recipe for Sprite is lemon and lime. I tried to make it at home. There's more to it than that. "Hey, you guys want some more homemade Sprite?" "Not until you figure out what the fuck else goes in it!"