The Dumbing Down...
We live in an increasingly convenient world. As you look around your surroundings, you should take note of the things that are more and more convenient a.k.a. dumbed down for the sake of our stupid selves.
What are these things that i speak so eloquently of? Of course... everything!
#1 example: computers.
When i was a lad, and learning computers back in lad school (yes, there is a lad school, and it was awesome), we learned commands in the ever-so-popular ms-dos. That's the microsoft disk operating system for you newbs. Back in the day, if we wanted to copy something from our 20 mb harddrive do a 5.25" floppy, yes, floppy disk, it wasn't anything near drag and drop. We would have to literally type in something to the extent of: copy c:\awesomeness\pornpicinbadresolution.gif a:\secretporndisk (we didn't even have .jpgs back then).
#2 example: television.
A long time ago, there was a book called "tv guide" where you would have to literally thumb through (you couldn't do it with any of your other fingers... just the thumbs), pages and pages of booklet in order to be able to find out what channel your favorite show was on and at what time. This process generally took so long that by the time you actually found the channel you wanted to watch, the program was over (even back when tv programs were closer to 30 minutes of actual programming instead of the approx. 4 minutes of programming mixed in with 26 minutes of commercials.... eric...). Now, you've got your on-screen tv guide where not only can you find out what channel your favorite program is on, but with a push of one button, you can actually flip to that channel. Such laziness...
#3 example (and probably the most compelling one at that): capri sun.
Capri sun you ask? Well, when i used to take my lunch to school in a he-man lunchbox (don't get me wrong, my lunch is still contained within a he-man lunchbox, i just don't take it to school anymore), i used to have a capri sun in my lunchbox. Seeing a capri sun in your lunchbox was a double-edged sword however. This is mainly due to the fact that it was pretty difficult to puncture only one side of the capri sun packaging whilst instead 99% of the time, the straw would pass through the front and the back layers of the capri sun thus ruining any chances of nice straw suction on the rest of the capri sun which was part of the appeal.
Now, what you have is a clear, thin, plastic area where the straw is intended to puncture the package. Granted, with considerable effort, it is still possible to puncture through the back layer of the package, it is not nearly as challenging nor satisfying to get the straw in successfully. Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.
People tend to blame the obesity of kids on fast food and junk food. Well, guess what? Kids when i was growing up had junk food and fast food which was probably worse than what the kids these days eat. I think it's the lack of mental stimulation and subsequent mental anguish at not being able to successfully copy a file from the hard disk to a floppy disk, not getting paper cuts from flipping, nay, thumbing through tv guides, and most of all, not having to toil with nor experience the sheer elation that came with successfully poking a straw into a capri sun.
Want to get the kids in better shape? Teach em failure.
Mitch Hedberg's QotD:
What are these things that i speak so eloquently of? Of course... everything!
#1 example: computers.
When i was a lad, and learning computers back in lad school (yes, there is a lad school, and it was awesome), we learned commands in the ever-so-popular ms-dos. That's the microsoft disk operating system for you newbs. Back in the day, if we wanted to copy something from our 20 mb harddrive do a 5.25" floppy, yes, floppy disk, it wasn't anything near drag and drop. We would have to literally type in something to the extent of: copy c:\awesomeness\pornpicinbadresolution.gif a:\secretporndisk (we didn't even have .jpgs back then).
#2 example: television.
A long time ago, there was a book called "tv guide" where you would have to literally thumb through (you couldn't do it with any of your other fingers... just the thumbs), pages and pages of booklet in order to be able to find out what channel your favorite show was on and at what time. This process generally took so long that by the time you actually found the channel you wanted to watch, the program was over (even back when tv programs were closer to 30 minutes of actual programming instead of the approx. 4 minutes of programming mixed in with 26 minutes of commercials.... eric...). Now, you've got your on-screen tv guide where not only can you find out what channel your favorite program is on, but with a push of one button, you can actually flip to that channel. Such laziness...
#3 example (and probably the most compelling one at that): capri sun.
Capri sun you ask? Well, when i used to take my lunch to school in a he-man lunchbox (don't get me wrong, my lunch is still contained within a he-man lunchbox, i just don't take it to school anymore), i used to have a capri sun in my lunchbox. Seeing a capri sun in your lunchbox was a double-edged sword however. This is mainly due to the fact that it was pretty difficult to puncture only one side of the capri sun packaging whilst instead 99% of the time, the straw would pass through the front and the back layers of the capri sun thus ruining any chances of nice straw suction on the rest of the capri sun which was part of the appeal.
Now, what you have is a clear, thin, plastic area where the straw is intended to puncture the package. Granted, with considerable effort, it is still possible to puncture through the back layer of the package, it is not nearly as challenging nor satisfying to get the straw in successfully. Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.
People tend to blame the obesity of kids on fast food and junk food. Well, guess what? Kids when i was growing up had junk food and fast food which was probably worse than what the kids these days eat. I think it's the lack of mental stimulation and subsequent mental anguish at not being able to successfully copy a file from the hard disk to a floppy disk, not getting paper cuts from flipping, nay, thumbing through tv guides, and most of all, not having to toil with nor experience the sheer elation that came with successfully poking a straw into a capri sun.
Want to get the kids in better shape? Teach em failure.
Mitch Hedberg's QotD:
There is a commercial on late-night TV for this thing you attach to a garden hose. It says, "You can water your hard-to-reach plants with this product." Who the fuck would make their plants hard to reach!? That seems so very mean. "I know you need water, but I'm gonna make you hard to reach. I will throw water at you. Hopefully, they will invent a product before you shrivel and die. Think like a cactus!"
posted by jon at
Tuesday, July 25, 2006
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